Adoption

Carl and I are starting our journey of adoption. We have been married almost 3 years and have been trying to conceive for 3 years. It just hasnt happened yet. Been to the doctor, had some tests and no medical reason so far that it hasnt happened. We have been completely open to adoption since we first discussed having children.  Carl is almost 40 and I am in my middle 30s. We both want kids and a family so we discussed our options right from the beginning. Being parents is important to us and we both know there are children out there who need homes, love and guidance. And whether children were biologically ours or not wouldnt make us love them any less. It seems like all our friends and family have children or on their own journey to parenthood, and the longer into our journey the harder it gets to see more friends and family adding to their families while we seem to be unable to make it happen for ourselves. We are extremely happy for others when they are expecting but its still hard. You can be happy for others and be sad for yourself at the same time. Last fall we had a discussion about what our next step was going to be....either keep trying to conceive our own child, try to adopt, try both at the same time or give up and live happy as a childless couple. I would have been happy with any of those choices but I felt like we needed to make a choice soon. At first we decided to continue to conceive on our own for 6 months and if at that time it hadnt happened we were going to go the adoption route. A few days later, after much thinking about it, I decided to call and get some information on adoption. After talking to the adoption counsellor, I realized the wait in this province for infants and toddlers is a longtime and the average age of children available for adoption in NB is 10. So Carl and I had a serious discussion about what age and how long we were willing to wait. And we decided that a 10 year wait wasnt realistic for us, we would be in our late 40s. We decided a older child would fit in to our lifestyle more comfortably and we also decided to not wait another 6 months, that we would start the process now. We got all the forms, our medicals done, got our references, gathered our financial records, had criminal checks done and sent everything into the Deptartment of Social Developement. A few weeks later we got a letter in the mail saying we could take our Pride course in Woodstock over 4 weekends right away or wait until they had the next training in Fredericton in a few months, we decided to start right away. A few weeks later we had a visit from Charlotte the adoption coorindator in Fredericton. It will probably be awhile before they complete our home study since there is a backlog in Fredericton and it is the summer season. But we are being patient, we know it will happen as its meant to, so far everything else has fallen into place like it was meant to. We have redone our spareroom to make it ready for a child. We are reading books and searching the internet for info that will better prepare us. We know the children we are seeking to adopt come with complicated pasts, histories of neglect, abuse and medical problems. But we think we can handle it, we have great support with our families, friends and our church. We will lean on the social workers, teachers, family and foster family of the child that comes into our lives for support also. In the end we hope to start our family and hopefully help a child in need. I will keep you updated along our journey!

100 Things I am Grateful For!

1 freshly mowed grass
2 homemade gifts
3 chocolate chip cookies right out of the oven
4 a hot bubble bath
5 sleeping with the windows open
6 chocolate covered stawberries
7 random acts of kindness
8 a phone call from someone to just say hi or I Love You!
9 a stocked freezer
10 checking things off my to do list
11 picnics on the beach
12 surprsie I Love You notes
13 a fresh coat of paint
14 thunderstorms
15 a clean bathroom
16 falling asleep with clean sheets and freshly shaved legs
17 fresh picked wild flowers
18 movie night at home
19 writing in my journal
20 forgiveness
21 cuddles and purrs from Bailey
22 new underwear
23 waking up with sunshine in my face
24 people who spay and neuter their pets
25 my digital camera
26 free outdoor concerts and movies
27 my crockpot
28 smores at a campfire
29 the search of self discovery
30 turkey sandwiches late at night after a big turkey dinner
31 books I have read and the ability to read
32 that Carl lets me sing in the truck without complaining
33 our king size bed and lots of room to stretch out
34 that I am independent but I have friends and family to fall back on
35 happy tears
36 slippers that glow in th dark
37 the peace I feel when I go to Church
38 my amazing best friend of over 20 years, Angie!
39 money in my wallet
40 watching someone do something they have much pasion for
41 sharing housework with someone else
42 honesty
43 being able to admit when I am wrong
44 strangers who say "hi" when you pass them on the street
45 getting a haircut
46 facebook
47 my mom
48 fruit especially oranges
49 being able to trust my intuition
50 long drives with no particular destination
51 Angie's salsa dip
52 New Years
53 a good respectful debate
54 that I have clean water to drink
55 BBQ parties on the deck
56 recylcing
57 Sophie and the patience she has taught me
58 the book "The Love Dare"
59 Friday night pizza night
60 my childhood
61 that I learned how to play crib
62 wine
63 my sister
64 when my house is clean
65 feeling safe when I am with my husband
66 hot chocolate on a cold day
67 time to meditate
68 finally feeling like I am an adult
69 memoreis and photo albums
70 when my favorite sports team wins
71 my home
72 my grandparents
73 pie
74 sunsets
75 kisses and hugs
76 knowing the difference between right and wrong
77 umbrellas on a rainy day
78 good neighbors
79 painted toenails
80 homemade bread fresh out of the oven
81 our truck
82 having travelled by airplane
83 planting a flower garden
84 when my favorite song comes on the radio
85 all the foster parents out there looking after kids who arent their own
86 not regretting my past and having learned from my mistakes
87 Carl's job
88 my dad
89 the stars and moon
90 ordering takeout late at night
91 crying during a sad movie
92 rainbows
93 Christmas traditions
94 family gatherings
95 Saturday morning waffles
96 barefeet
97 teachers
98 Carl
99 Being alive
100 Finishing this list!

Sports

What an exciting day yesterday in our house! Well not overly exciting but pretty cool, our favorite hockey team, the Montreal Canadiens, beat out the Stanley cup champs to move on the next round of the playoffs!  Carl was pretty excited, he has been a lifelong Habs fan and hasnt seen his team do this well in the playoffs since they last won the cup in the 90s! While Carl was watching the game in the living room I was cuddled up in bed watching American Idol and switching back during the commercials to check the game, but I pretty much knew what was going on from the cheers from the living room.  Ours is a house filled with sports almost everyday. I have always loved hockey and nascar, but since Carl and I have been together I have become very fond of baseball. It is Carl's favorite sport and now that I know the rules I have become hooked. If there is a game on, then its probably being watched at our house. Carl was a baseball and soccer player in is younger days, now he plays softball in a mens league here in the city.  We watch nascar every weekend and cheer for our favorite drivers( Dale Jr for Carl and Tony Stewart for me!), its a ritual and even on our wedding night the tv was on in the hotel room so we could see the end of the race! We watch the Olympics, Junior hockey championships and any other popular sporting events going. We love sports and love cheering for our favorite teams...Go Habs!

Where to start.....

I can think of a million topics I would like to write about and cant decide where to start. So this one is just gonna be a jumble of ideas and we will see where it takes us. I am sure some of these things will end up as a topic all their own in the future. This year I made a resolution to have a more peaceful year, I wanted more love, peace , positivity and quiet in my life. I wanted to be happy, be less judgemental of people, to enjoy life, to be happy with simplier things, to enjoy the smallest things, to learn, be healthier, be kinder to the environment, be more consciencious of the world around me and be more compassionate and giving. So far so good...I think. We starting going back to church, actually we are part of a group who started a new church, its such a happy, postive place where people are so friendly to each other and people really care and share love with each other. It is a joy to get up every Sunday morning and go there. My husband started the year in the hospital, not a fun place to spend New Years!! He had high blood pressure and was in the hospital for a week, his father had a stroke in his early forties and Carl is approaching that age, he had many tests done and it was a scary time for both of us, but no damage was done to his heart and it served more as a wake up call for us. He has lost 20 pounds since January and we now eat better, and started walking. I am so proud of him and so thankful that we got the wake up call before real tragedy struck. We also started the process of adoption this year. Both of us have alweays wanted children and we started trying right after we got married. Almost 3 years later it hasnt happened yet. We have has some tests done and the doctor says there is no medical reason why it hasnt, but like I said before Carl is approaching 40 and I am in my 30s. We dont want to keep trying for years and then be left with no family or start trying to adopt when we are older, so we decided now was the time. If down the road we get pregnant, thats great we will have an adopted child and one born to us, but either way we will be happy. Right now we are taking the PRIDE training course, I will keep you updated on the process! Some other topics that will probably come up will be cooking, I am obsessed with finding and trying new recipes. Autism is another topic close to my heart. My 5 year old neice was diagnosed with autism 3 years ago. She has taught me so much about patience and compassion. Her mother is a single parent dealing with this on her own, I am very proud of her and I hope I can help shed a little light on the subject and bring some awareness to this disorder and fuel some compassion towards all the parents and children dealing with this. So I am sure these and other topics will pop up, I am sure some will be rants, other inspiring stores and maybe just a laugh or tow, we all need a funny story and a laugh now and again! Hope everyone enjoys their day and finds some small thing to smile and be greatful about.

Blessing
Heather

Who I am?

Hi, my name is Heather. I am 33 years old, live in Fredericton NB. I have been married to Carl for almost 3 years. We have one cat, no kids but we are in the process of adopting. I am a daughter, grandaughter, sister and aunt. I have wonderful friends too. We go to a non denominational church. We love sports, hockey, baseball, nascar etc. I am a housewife right now, and hopefully soon a stay at home mom. I love reading, walking, swimming, camping, cooking, spending time with my family and my favorite place in the world is the beach. I am hoping with this blog I can share some of my favorite things, ideas, thoughts, feelings and hopefully I can inspire you or make you think!